Security Vs Freedom

Rob and I have a good life. We have financial and job security, a cottage in the country and live within walking distance of Snowdonia National park. Everything we love and need is here in North Wales, yet we're leaving it behind to step in to the unknown.   The prospect of which is both exciting and terrifying! 

I was once asked what I would do if I didn't work for Supertemps, if they closed down tomorrow and I found myself without work. I answered without much hesitation and felt a rush of excitement as I exclaimed "I would pack my bags and work abroad!"

That night, I came home gushing to Rob how much I realised that I want to travel. It is something we have always talked about, and  we have been fortunate to visit some amazing places. But living and working in another country is just far more rewarding than going on holiday. And so our plans began.  The more we talked about it and told friends and family, the more it felt real.  Now, as I'm writing it is only 10 weeks away.  

There would always be the hurdle of leaving the security of the life we have now. In particular, the security of work. Working in Recruitment I know what the market is like, the chances of me finding a job as good as I have now with a company I love working for seemed quite slim. Rob has also had some great projects thrown at him and has had more work than he can cope with. More so than ever, now is the time he could grow the business and take on staff.  The biggest challenge for us both has been accepting that we are both sacrificing our careers.  But then, we are hoping this trip will enable us to do something we would only dream of doing when we retire and probably only if we won the lottery.   

After applying and waiting patiently for our visas, the guilt of going to work each day 

weighed heavily on my shoulders. With each holiday request I was given, with each meeting, I was filled with guilt knowing that I wouldn't be there and I felt sad at the prospect of leaving.  

My vision of a perfectly executed resignation with a rehearsed speech once we had concrete plans didn't materialise at all. Instead I was invited to a meeting with the Directors who listed all my achievements and how they an invitation take up a new role.  This is the exact opposite of what I wanted to happen.  Massive guilt alert!  What idiot turns down a great job opportunity to go and bum around the world?

I found myself in a big puddle of doubt asking myself questions like "are we doing the right thing?" "What would we benefit by going?"  "What idiot would up give up such a great opportunity?" I had the perfect opportunity and timing to tell my employer our plans, but equally at risk of being told my P45 was being sent in the post. At this point,  we also had no visa, no concrete plans, no flights and a good 4 months before we plan on going, all whilst we're racking up a hefty bill on tradesmen as our new kitchen is being fitted. 

I had a few options, but went with the trusty gut instinct. I don't recall what or  how I said it, but I do remember feeling sick and shaking quite a lot. Whatever I did say must have been positive, because to my absolute surprise, I was not marched off the premises and issued a p45. Instead, I was told the position still stood and they would wait until I got back. 

Simply amazing. I now have the security of a job I love when we return and the freedom to enjoy the next 6 months making our dreams come true. 

Let the adventure begin...